"My plan, for several years, has been to simply let one year merge into the other, without fanfare, s..." — Grace Dent

No one should suffer my pastry.

I eat food from all over the world for my job as a restaurant critic, so I often find myself craving a plain Barnsley lamb chop or fish and chips, as I'm so sick of sashimi.

If I desire something badly enough, I'll buy it for myself; and this thing will never be a Yankee Candle gift set or a book bought beside a shop till that delivers 'The Tao Of Pooh.'

I don't like birthdays. Never have done. Not when I was little and it involved the wild decadence of a Wimpy Brown Derby doughnut with chocolate drizzle, and even less so as I grew older.