"Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and you start to sne..." — Jean Kerr

Nobody ever wrote better about domestic things than Robert Benchley.

A man speaks only when driven to speech by something outside himself - like, for instance, he can't find any clean socks.

It's easier to write about what you know. I wouldn't write about a Wall Street broker, for example.

Even though a number of people have tried, no one has ever found a way to drink for a living.