"Being in the latter stages of life means the morning is unkind to the reflection. It takes a few hou..." — Jeremy Hardy

I'm writing a movie script about vampires with an animator called Michael Booth.

You can sometimes sneak a political joke in, which is sometimes the most effective place for a political joke - when it's not expected. It's just the most fun thing to do.

I love doing 'I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue' on Radio 4. It's my favourite thing to do because it's just daft: it's not about the news. It's not about anything.

For years, I've mocked Norfolk and King's Lynn, and now I find out I'm from there!