“I've had soccer moms come up and tell me they can relate when I say that I want …” — Louis C. K.

You can't cancel my stand-up tours. It's impossible. There's too many separate bosses. There is no 'bosses.'

I'm enjoying the work while I get it right now.

The only pitch I have to movie people is the same as this one: Just give me $8 million. I'm not telling you what it's about and I'm not telling you who's in it.

I was an awkward kid.