"I never eat in a restaurant that's over a hundred feet off the ground and won't stand still." — Calvin Trillin

I never did very well in math - I could never seem to persuade the teacher that I hadn't meant my answers literally.

There's always a source for humor.

With humor, it's so subjective that trying to think of what the ideal reader would think would drive you crazy.

People, not just reporters, are more interested in politics than in government, so the actual issues wouldn't be something that interested them.