Jonathan Swift

My nose itched, and I knew I should drink wine or kiss a fool.

The proper words in the proper places are the true definition of style.

It is impossible that anything so natural, so necessary, and so universal as death, should ever have been designed by providence as an evil to mankind.

Once kick the world, and the world and you will live together at a reasonably good understanding.

Most sorts of diversion in men, children and other animals, are in imitation of fighting.

A tavern is a place where madness is sold by the bottle.