“A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands…” — Robert Orben

Happiness is a very small desk and a very big wastebasket.

With my luck, if I ever invested in General Motors, they'd bust it to Corporal!

More than ever before, Americans are suffering from back problems: back taxes, back rent, back auto payments.

Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.