Casey Stengel

I came in here and a fella asked me to have a drink. I said I don't drink. Then another fella said hear you and Joe DiMaggio aren't speaking and I said I'll take that drink.

Oldtimers, weekends, and airplane landings are alike. If you can walk away from them, they're successful.

It's wonderful to meet so many friends that I didn't used to like.

Managing is getting paid for home runs that someone else hits.

The Yankees don't pay me to win every day, just two out of three.

Son, we'd like to keep you around this season but we're going to try and win a pennant.

I've tried to give a dollar and 25 cents in work for every dollar paid me.

The trouble with women umpires is that I couldn't argue with one. I'd put my arms around her and give her a little kiss.

I don't know if he throws a spitball but he sure spits on the ball.

I was not successful as a ball player, as it was a game of skill.

Don't drink in the hotel bar, that's where I do my drinking.

Two hundred million Americans, and there ain't two good catchers among 'em.

When you are younger you get blamed for crimes you never committed and when you're older you begin to get credit for virtues you never possessed. It evens itself out.

I was such a dangerous hitter I even got intentional walks during batting practice.

Being with a woman all night never hurt no professional baseball player. It's staying up all night looking for a woman that does him in.

I got players with bad watches - they can't tell midnight from noon.

Ability is the art of getting credit for all the home runs somebody else hits.

I feel greatly honored to have a ballpark named after me, especially since I've been thrown out of so many.

Don't cut my throat, I may want to do that later myself.

I was a left-handed dentist who made people cry.